Today

So I am gonna go get tested today and I couldn't be more freaked out. I had the worst dreams last night. I guess its just a part of me to always go directly to the worst case scenario. It just sucks because when I got tested last time, he was there, no matter what happened I knew he would be there no matter what. Now, if I do have something like HIV, I feel like Im kind of alone, and what's worse is that if I do have HIV, I probably gave it to him, and he probably has given it to the other guy. That's two lives I have ruined. I guess I will have to cross that bridge when I get there...I hope I never get there...